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So, I finally caved in and watched the final episode of The Cape. And now I have no more, and all is sad. Although, on the plus side, they didn't try to rush everything to a conclusion, which would have been lame. This means that all is not as sad as it could have been. This does not in any way let NBC off the hook, needless to say. They clearly have a grudge against television.
In a cruel twist of fate, just in case the impending closure to the series isn't tragedy enough, there is yet further sorrow awaiting in this final episode. Although the Carnival of Crime is here to see the series out, it's one of the episodes where only half of them are around. So I don't get to say a last farewell to the Now Forever Nameless Tattooed Lady, or to Mesmerist Ruvi Of The Awesome Clothing. No fair. I like Ruvi, damn it. Also his floaty clothes, his nail polish, his jewellery and his remarkable boots. Happily, Ringmaster Max also wears remarkable boots, so all is not totally a loss. But anyway.
Orwell has gone mad. She has painted her entire apartment white, and now spends her days curled up in a circle. She seems to be suffering guilt for her attempts to destroy her father, but I'm not entirely sure. Presumably we'd have found out eventually, but thanks to NBC, that will now never happen.
Meanwhile, Vince's little family are watching the TV news. Ark has been unmasked as corrupt, with connections to organised crime. Is the end nigh for Peter Fleming?
He thinks not, and tells massed reporters that he's as surprised as everybody else to find out that his evil empire is evil. He promises to investigate personally. This, it should be perfectly clear, is in no way a conflict of interest at all.
Elsewhere in the city, Marty Who Was Once Vince's Partner But Betrayed Him is making breakfast with his family. Breakfast appears to consist of two rashers of bacon, two sausagers and thirty thousand oranges, which ought to make an interesting meal for four people.
That Spinosaurus is going to make mincemeat out of that fighter plane.
Also, armed police are homing in.
Dinosaurs! But that Utahraptor ought to have feathers. Also there's no way that those soldiers are fitting into that fighter plane, and I have no idea what any of them are expected to make of the orange juice. Or the slightly surprising glass of breakfast margarita hiding behind it.
Marty has been arrested. Peter Fleming tells him that he's got to take the fall for all the corruption. If he doesn't, his family will be murdered. Marty is not happy.
Vince's widow turns up to do some lawyering, and tells him that he's got to turn state's evidence. How does she think that walking into the lion's den and shouting "Help me to expose all this corruption!" is going to be safe for either of them?
Shortly afterwards, a mysterious benefactor posts bail for Marty, and out he goes into the world's most obvious trap. The massed ranks of the Press help enormously.
Vince does a good bit of photogenic posing, before dashing to the rescue, and dispatching assassins with gay abandon.
Wheeeeee!
He then does his 'disappearing in a puff of smoke' trick, except he takes his widow, Marty, and Marty's wife along with him, and how does that work exactly? You throw the bomb, and then use it as cover for your escape. This surely only works if you know what to do, and are ready to do it. It certainly doesn't work if you're a clueless pile of limbs huddled up in a heap on the pavement. But it looked good, right in front of every journalist in the city.
Vince takes everybody to the carnival. Rollo, who of course witnessed Vince's framing as Chess, and knows who was behind it, does a good job of glowering at Marty whenever possible.
Whilst Vince angsts over the close proximity of his widow. Diagonally, for some reason.
Also diagonal is Peter Fleming, here playing chess with his tailor, whilst sending Scales (Hurrah! Scales!) off to eliminate Marty and The Cape. Which isn't a music hall duo, no matter how much it may sound like one. Poor Scales. The tailor has picked up on Fleming's blatant treacherousness, but Scales is too busy admiring his own brilliance to catch on.
Meawhile, Marty comes clean to Vince's widow (she's called Dana, by the way). He tells her how he helped to frame Vince. Vince, who for everybody's protection needs to remain anonymous until Ark is taken down, twitches and angsts in a corner, and begins slowly edging into place to swoop to the rescue.
Fortunately, Ringmaster Max sees all, and intercepts.
Cue further angsting. It's not easy being a superhero.
But the angsting must wait for, as ever, trouble is approaching. Using a cellphone as a homing beacon, Ark have zeroed in on the gang.
Have I mentioned before how pretty this show is? The visuals are glorious.
Rollo sneaks out the children and Vince's wife, whilst Orwell escorts Dana to safety.
But Scales catches up with Marty and Vince as they try to escape in the other direction. Marty throws himself in front of Vince, and acquires two large holes he didn't want.
At which point, Ark turns up and arrests Scales for murder, and for colluding with Marty in his corruptionanigans.
Marty is no longer in any shape to complain about being Fleming's scapegoat. As he sprawls decorously in the shadows, the Cape lets him in on the secret of his identity, and promises to look after his family, always supposing there's time with everything else that's going on (he doesn't say that bit). Marty dies.
And Peter Fleming assures the Press that Ark is now crystal clear and corruption free once again. And not even the slightest bit evil. He checked.
The media are also extremely interested in the amazing disappearing superhero that the town has apparently just acquired. Presumably this new awareness of The Cape could have been interesting in future episodes, had NBC not been such bastards.
Dana has a hilariously photoshopped picture of her and Vince. Couldn't the show have got them to stand together in front of an actual tree at any point during the making of the programme? Anyway, Orwell has seen her safely home.
She now proceeds to get all strange and foreshadowy, muttering about how it's better to be blindsided by events, but that she's always been the sort of person who reads the end of a book first. Dana smiles politely, whilst edging towards the knife drawer. I'm really not sure where this is going. It's either hinting at a dark fate awaiting Orwell herself, or it's pointing towards the eventual downfall of Fleming, and her regret at the necessity of that. I don't know. Presumably we'd have found out, in due time, were NBC not utter bastards.
Back at the carnival, Ringmaster Max pours some Vietnamese snake wine, with which he and Vince can toast the future, and Marty, and stuff.
Ringmaster Max has a splendid caravan. Have I mentioned how pretty this series is? The set dressers and costume department deserve all the applause in the world. NBC deserve none.
And thus, with the salute of a glass, The Cape is over. And NBC are bastards (also, night follows day, and the world is round). So many unanswered questions, so many things that could have been.
Did I mention that NBC are bastards?
In a cruel twist of fate, just in case the impending closure to the series isn't tragedy enough, there is yet further sorrow awaiting in this final episode. Although the Carnival of Crime is here to see the series out, it's one of the episodes where only half of them are around. So I don't get to say a last farewell to the Now Forever Nameless Tattooed Lady, or to Mesmerist Ruvi Of The Awesome Clothing. No fair. I like Ruvi, damn it. Also his floaty clothes, his nail polish, his jewellery and his remarkable boots. Happily, Ringmaster Max also wears remarkable boots, so all is not totally a loss. But anyway.
Orwell has gone mad. She has painted her entire apartment white, and now spends her days curled up in a circle. She seems to be suffering guilt for her attempts to destroy her father, but I'm not entirely sure. Presumably we'd have found out eventually, but thanks to NBC, that will now never happen.
Meanwhile, Vince's little family are watching the TV news. Ark has been unmasked as corrupt, with connections to organised crime. Is the end nigh for Peter Fleming?
He thinks not, and tells massed reporters that he's as surprised as everybody else to find out that his evil empire is evil. He promises to investigate personally. This, it should be perfectly clear, is in no way a conflict of interest at all.
Elsewhere in the city, Marty Who Was Once Vince's Partner But Betrayed Him is making breakfast with his family. Breakfast appears to consist of two rashers of bacon, two sausagers and thirty thousand oranges, which ought to make an interesting meal for four people.
That Spinosaurus is going to make mincemeat out of that fighter plane.
Also, armed police are homing in.
Dinosaurs! But that Utahraptor ought to have feathers. Also there's no way that those soldiers are fitting into that fighter plane, and I have no idea what any of them are expected to make of the orange juice. Or the slightly surprising glass of breakfast margarita hiding behind it.
Marty has been arrested. Peter Fleming tells him that he's got to take the fall for all the corruption. If he doesn't, his family will be murdered. Marty is not happy.
Vince's widow turns up to do some lawyering, and tells him that he's got to turn state's evidence. How does she think that walking into the lion's den and shouting "Help me to expose all this corruption!" is going to be safe for either of them?
Shortly afterwards, a mysterious benefactor posts bail for Marty, and out he goes into the world's most obvious trap. The massed ranks of the Press help enormously.
Vince does a good bit of photogenic posing, before dashing to the rescue, and dispatching assassins with gay abandon.
Wheeeeee!
He then does his 'disappearing in a puff of smoke' trick, except he takes his widow, Marty, and Marty's wife along with him, and how does that work exactly? You throw the bomb, and then use it as cover for your escape. This surely only works if you know what to do, and are ready to do it. It certainly doesn't work if you're a clueless pile of limbs huddled up in a heap on the pavement. But it looked good, right in front of every journalist in the city.
Vince takes everybody to the carnival. Rollo, who of course witnessed Vince's framing as Chess, and knows who was behind it, does a good job of glowering at Marty whenever possible.
Whilst Vince angsts over the close proximity of his widow. Diagonally, for some reason.
Also diagonal is Peter Fleming, here playing chess with his tailor, whilst sending Scales (Hurrah! Scales!) off to eliminate Marty and The Cape. Which isn't a music hall duo, no matter how much it may sound like one. Poor Scales. The tailor has picked up on Fleming's blatant treacherousness, but Scales is too busy admiring his own brilliance to catch on.
Meawhile, Marty comes clean to Vince's widow (she's called Dana, by the way). He tells her how he helped to frame Vince. Vince, who for everybody's protection needs to remain anonymous until Ark is taken down, twitches and angsts in a corner, and begins slowly edging into place to swoop to the rescue.
Fortunately, Ringmaster Max sees all, and intercepts.
Cue further angsting. It's not easy being a superhero.
But the angsting must wait for, as ever, trouble is approaching. Using a cellphone as a homing beacon, Ark have zeroed in on the gang.
Have I mentioned before how pretty this show is? The visuals are glorious.
Rollo sneaks out the children and Vince's wife, whilst Orwell escorts Dana to safety.
But Scales catches up with Marty and Vince as they try to escape in the other direction. Marty throws himself in front of Vince, and acquires two large holes he didn't want.
At which point, Ark turns up and arrests Scales for murder, and for colluding with Marty in his corruptionanigans.
Marty is no longer in any shape to complain about being Fleming's scapegoat. As he sprawls decorously in the shadows, the Cape lets him in on the secret of his identity, and promises to look after his family, always supposing there's time with everything else that's going on (he doesn't say that bit). Marty dies.
And Peter Fleming assures the Press that Ark is now crystal clear and corruption free once again. And not even the slightest bit evil. He checked.
The media are also extremely interested in the amazing disappearing superhero that the town has apparently just acquired. Presumably this new awareness of The Cape could have been interesting in future episodes, had NBC not been such bastards.
Dana has a hilariously photoshopped picture of her and Vince. Couldn't the show have got them to stand together in front of an actual tree at any point during the making of the programme? Anyway, Orwell has seen her safely home.
She now proceeds to get all strange and foreshadowy, muttering about how it's better to be blindsided by events, but that she's always been the sort of person who reads the end of a book first. Dana smiles politely, whilst edging towards the knife drawer. I'm really not sure where this is going. It's either hinting at a dark fate awaiting Orwell herself, or it's pointing towards the eventual downfall of Fleming, and her regret at the necessity of that. I don't know. Presumably we'd have found out, in due time, were NBC not utter bastards.
Back at the carnival, Ringmaster Max pours some Vietnamese snake wine, with which he and Vince can toast the future, and Marty, and stuff.
Ringmaster Max has a splendid caravan. Have I mentioned how pretty this series is? The set dressers and costume department deserve all the applause in the world. NBC deserve none.
And thus, with the salute of a glass, The Cape is over. And NBC are bastards (also, night follows day, and the world is round). So many unanswered questions, so many things that could have been.
Did I mention that NBC are bastards?
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